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theoldguardkinkmeme) wrote2020-07-22 10:07 am
theoldguardkinkmeme) wrote2020-07-22 10:07 am
Fills Post
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"The Jealous Moon" Part 2/2
(Anonymous) 2020-08-10 03:01 pm (UTC)(link)Booker's straight-lettered English entries were rare and only chronicled the disguised facts of contacts and missions in a personal cipher: "Black Bishop called for pest control in the beg. month of leaves where spiced tea was 1st sipped. The Piper will lead the children to the hill where they plan to slay the ghosts of rats." It's clever. No dates or names or places in case the journal falls into the wrong hands.
Sebastien wrote in his native tongue, penned in the rough calligraphy his schools had barely had the chance to refine during the turbulent political times of his childhood. Everything was undated and rambling: memories of his life before the war that had granted him his immortality, the stubborn insistence of holding on to his family as time tore them apart, the guilt and grief and anger as his sons spat vicious words on their deathbeds in their fear and jealousy. Eventually the content turned more to the present as Sebastien tried to move on. He noted the virtues and peccadilloes of their foursome, individuals' likes and dislikes.
What he had written about Joe and Nicky was tinged with wistful envy: "I have never before met two people whose bodies and souls dwelt so close and comfortably together. They are rarely of a single mind or temperament, but complementary in every action and word. Their love cannot be overlooked once one has seen it, it is visible in every glance and gesture and word that is intently spoken. Sometimes it seems that their world exists only between they two and everything and -one on the outside are mere shadows. If I cannot have a similar partner in eternal life, then I would be pleased to be a protector of them and shield them from the shadow-world that is not."
It was beautiful, despite the misspellings and crooked words of a writer who was often drunk when he lost his grip on his emotions and bled them onto a page. Amongst the handful of mentions about Nicky and Joe there was one entry towards the end that deviated from the admiration of an outsider: "The beauty of them tempts me with what I can never have. They are whole. Complete. Darkness and light. Either of them are flawed individuals, but together they ascend to divinity. Our eldest is the balance of all things, both nurturing and merciless. I know not what I am to them except a child. My mortal life was spent defining myself through my relationships... I am lost without being known as Son or Husband or Father. These ancient beings that surround me have no spaces for me to fill beyond ally or friend."
"He should be here."
"Looks like we have to dig."
It's agony to come back to life. Every single cell unfreezing and repairing as his body thaws out. When his brain starts coming back online he realizes that he is being held down in scalding water. He struggles but his body isn't working right.
"Shh shh shh." Nicky makes soothing sounds as he strokes Sebastien's face. "We're here. Just warming you up."
Coming back to life always hurts, but this also makes his heart ache and feel heavy. He wants the cold back but Nicky refuses. Nicky calls Joe over and they haul him up and help him balance on tingling feet while they dry him off. He keeps his eyes closed, not wanting to see their faces.
"Your hair has gotten shaggy, cucciolo," Nicky says playfully as he scruffs a towel through it.
The gentle teasing makes Sebastien break. He can't stop tears from leaking. He hates them for this. "Je voudrais mourir," he manages to stutter out in a cracking, creaking voice.
"Je connais, Sebastien. We understand. It's not your time yet." Joe wraps himself around Sebastien and hold him for a minute before he moves and helps him get into a bed. He cuddles up on Sebastien's right and Nicky slides in on his left. It's something Sebastien has only experienced a handful of times but has longed for hundreds of times. His brain only registers that Nicky is naked after several moments.
"This isn't how I wanted it to be." He's still using his first language, his mind muddled and slow.
Nicky presses a kiss to his temple and curls around him. "Dormire, caro mio."
Booker wakes up still wrapped up in their arms, between them. His mind is clear. Used to the softness of snow, the edges of the room seem harsh and more dangerous than the cold. The warmth is stifling.
"Let me go," he mumbles. I don't deserve this after everything I did to you.
"We did back in London," Nicky replies. "That was a mistake. Maybe we do not let you go now and piece you back together."
"Ego sum nihil."
Joe fucking chuckles. It's almost silent, but Book can feel the small concussive bursts of his body. "Even I, the heathen, knows what that means. And you are not, ya amar."
"I don't know what that means," Booker admits.
"Lune. He calls you his moon," Nicky says, nuzzling into Booker's hair.
That makes Book's mind stall, trying to interpret why Joe would say that.
"Nicolo has been my sun for centuries. Steadfast and sharing his divine light upon all the facets of my soul. I had forgotten that the moon is just as constant, stimulating the tides in both pleasant laps and tumultuous waves. I kept my face turned to the sun and was blinded to the gentler effects from the moon and simply raged against the unignorable tsunami. Now I promise to be a diligent fisherman and dictate my life by both the sea and the sky."
Booker is fluent in English and understands most of what Joe is saying but is slow to pick it apart and understand.
"Sebastien doesn't have the experience one needs to prune your flowery language, Yusuf," Nicky chides with an audible smile.
"Ah," Joe sighs dramatically. He tightens his arms around Booker. "My sky can host the moon as well as the sun and be more beautiful for the presence of both."
"Incurable romantic," Nicky pretends to scoff, like Booker's heard him complain hundreds of times before. But this time... is Joe spouting his poetry about him?
"I betrayed you," Book argues. "You and Andy and Nile justifiably banished me. My penance is to feel every minute of another century trickle past in agony at being alone."
"That's not what any of us needed," Nicky says. "If the cause that led you to Copley and Merrick was your alienation from your new family while you mourned the loss of your old one, we are to blame as well. More pain isn't going to fix our family, only love will heal us."
"Je t'aime mon frère, ma lune," Joe murmurs with a kiss to his cheek.
"Our eyes and arms are open for you, Sebastien," Nicky says, turning Book's head to meet his gaze. His thumb gently wipes away the stream of tears from one cheek. "Love us as you have longed to do and we will give you back everything we can, whole-heartedly."
Nicky looks so kind and soft and fond, his attention all on Sebastien and his eyes and mouth so vibrant and alive with color. Sebastian cannot resist pressing his lips against Nicky's pretty pink ones. He keeps it chaste because he knows Joe is watching from over his shoulder, and when he reluctantly pulls away Joe shifts them so that he can roll Sebastien onto his back and press back against his side.
"My spirit fills with affection rather than jealousy," Joe says to Sebastien's timid eyes.
"Fuck off with the poetry, Joe, and kiss the poor man," Nicky teases.
Joe looks up briefly in pretended annoyance, but does as instructed. His mouth is more demanding than Nicky's, and his beard- regrown since Florida but in a new style- tangles against the mess of Booker's own neglected scruff.
Sebastien can only lie there stunned after Joe pulls away. Both men patiently wait for him to speak. The weight of his jealousy and loneliness and (most of all) guilt is still crushing, but there's a new lightness in his chest that he can't believe he deserves. "I-I don't..."
"The only thing you can say to stop this would be to say you don't want us," Nicky says.
"I don't deserve this."
Joe's hand falls on Book's chest and begins making soothing circles. "We will just have to convince you, then."
"The two of us killed each other many times in gruesome and hateful ways," Nicky says, his face incongruously fond as he looks at both Booker and Joe. "We are good at forgiving. We will teach you how to be, too."
Re: "The Jealous Moon" Part 2/2
(Anonymous) 2020-08-10 03:20 pm (UTC)(link)Re: "The Jealous Moon" Part 2/2
(Anonymous) 2020-08-10 04:44 pm (UTC)(link)And this line
"Fuck off with the poetry, Joe, and kiss the poor man," Nicky teases.
made me laugh out loud.
Thank you so much for sharing, dear author <3
Re: "The Jealous Moon" Part 2/2
(Anonymous) 2020-08-10 05:27 pm (UTC)(link)Re: "The Jealous Moon" Part 2/2
(Anonymous) 2020-08-11 04:15 pm (UTC)(link)Re: "The Jealous Moon" Part 2/2
(Anonymous) 2020-08-14 03:19 pm (UTC)(link)